Although I’ve only been seeing my current psychiatrist for a short period of time he has taught me ALOT. So I thought I’d share a few lessons with you.
- It’s ok to admit you need help after denying it for years. For years I’ve denied the possibility that I may have bi polar. After going through treatment for an eating disorder and body dysmorphic I was done with medical professionals by 18. I wanted to be a normal adult and go partying and kiss cute guys, which was why I was so scared to hold my hands up and say “ok I was wrong, you were right, I need help”. The second I sat down with my psychiatrist he smiled and made me feel at ease because he was proud that I had come myself, it was a significant moment for me. Instead of being cornered and dragged to get help I’d recognized what was going on and admitted I wasn’t right.
- Asking for that £1 here and there back from a friend is ok. Why? Because you end up broke! An example of this is I have spent YEARS offering to pay for cabs for friends or the odd pounds that are left on bills that clearly isn’t mine to pay because I was too scared I’d look penny pinching and tight. Now that I’ve start asking for the money back I’ve felt good and my friends all accept it without a single one tuting. I figured out I’ve probably wasted over £300 doing this.
- Putting your own feelings first is ok. If anything this is the most important thing I’ve learnt. You need time to understand yourself and deal with hidden feelings. My psychiatrist puts it this way – “You can’t be your best self until you’ve dealt with your worst, how do you expect to move forward if you’re still hold on to the past?”
- You can’t expect to feel fine after one appointment. I thought after that first appointment that everything would be fine and I’d get everything off my chest. NOPE. It doesn’t work like that, you have to work at understanding why you do the things you do and how to change the way you think about them.
I could go on and on with this list but then I’d start to ramble and we all don’t want that do we! I’ve decided that as always my psychiatrist is right and that I’m truly going to try and get as much positivity from this experience as I can.
Also I’ve started a videoing a one second a day clip, on the app 1 sec daily. I’ve found that it’s really helping me keep the positivity whilst the depression is around, as I’m able to see that no matter what, there will always be one second of happiness in the day 🙂