Today’s been different.
Today’s been kind.
Today is the first day in over a year that I have felt slightly like myself again.
Today I’ve spent the majority of my day smiling.
After seeing my psychiatrist on Thursday it’s really hit home that I’m going to be fine. Every bad day I’ve had has been down to an imbalance of chemicals in my brain. 2018 has been a really trying year for me and I thought being diagnosed with Bipolar was just another thing to add to the list. In fact it has been, but it’s been the best thing that I’ve added to the list. Without this diagnosis I would probably still be drinking myself into depression and driving myself to psychosis.
Getting this diagnosis has in fact given me my life back. I think going to the festival on Friday was my biggest fear conquered and now that’s done, I’m not really worried anymore or sad about Bipolar. I was always worried that my new sleep pattern and non drinking lifestyle would make me the bore of the party when in fact it’s done the opposite. I can actually go out with my friends and be the only one who doesn’t wake up hung over and be the one who remembers EVERYTHING. My friends still include me in everything and I haven’t changed in their eyes, I’m not the freak that doesn’t drink, I’m just Rosie, Rosie with a new lifestyle.
Today I’ve enjoyed being at work, I’ve enjoyed doing my job, I’ve enjoyed my coffee and most importantly I’ve enjoyed being busy. I’m now going to enjoy going to the gym (if that’s possible) and enjoy a good gossip with my best boy mate.
Today, thank you for being the day that I’m happy to be alive and living my life again.