To the girl at the gym,
You make me self-conscious and you make me realise everything that’s wrong with me. When you walk onto the running floor every girl looks and you can tell by the look in their eyes that they feel threatened. You’re the real version of a “instagram fitness model” and you damn know it.
I lost my confidence big time this year. I hate my body. I hate what it’s become, I hate that it had nothing to do with me and was out of my control. When you first walked into the room you made me feel about the size of a pea and feel every insecurity I have ever had.
Going to the gym was always going to be hard for me. I used to use the gym as a way to control my weight when I should’ve been using it to build my strength. I was dreading running into someone like you because it would make me come face to face with the fact that I can’t run from you anymore. I can’t run away from perfect stomachs and perfect bums and perfect lips and perfect legs. I have to carry on my cardio whilst you sit across the room from me looking perfect, whilst I’m red in the face a sweating like a pig on a hot summer’s day.
However now, I feel the size of a green bean and I don’t have so many insecurities.
I just want to say thank you. Thank you for giving me motivation to be you. Thank you for giving me my mojo back and for making me realise that if I work hard enough that you could be me. WE could all be you. Thank you for being that new goal for me. I want people to turn and double look at me when I walk into a room and think “Damn, that girl looks after herself”.
The first thing I wanted to do when I got home that night was make myself be sick and not eat but I didn’t and I had a full bowl of pasta.
So to the girl at the gym.
You go girl.
-Nothing in life has any business being perfect.